Friday, December 03, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
"But for some reason men persist. Why? And here's what we're getting to, because men have always been in charge, especially white men. Brett Favre is like a lot of white males. He's owned the world for so long, he's going a little crazy now that he doesn't. Also like many white men across the country, he lost his job to a Mexican.
And if Brett Favre's penis could talk, what would it say? Well, other than no photos please, I think it would say, I'm not a witch. I'm you. Because for hundreds of years, white penises were America. White penises found America. They made the rules and they called the shots, in the workplace, in the home and at the ballot box. But now the unthinkable is happening. White penises are becoming the minority. 2010 was the first year in which more minority babies were born than white babies. This is what conservatives are really upset about. That the president is black, and the Secretary of State is a woman, and every shortstop is Latino, and every daytime talk show host is a lesbian. And suddenly this country is way off track and needs some serious restoring. If penises could cry, and I believe they can, then white penises are crying all over America. And that's where this crew comes in. The lovely MILFs of the new rank. And their little secret is that their popularity comes exclusively from white men. Look at the polling. Minorities hate them. Women hate them. Only white men like them. I'm no psychiatrist but I do own a couch. And my theory is that these women represent something those men miss dearly: the traditional idiot housewife.
If an election between Obama and Sarah Palin were held today and only white men could vote, Sarah Palin would be president. Did you know that in 1788, when there were 4 million people in America, only 39,000 of them, the rich white men, got to vote? That doesn’t sound good to you? Well, what I if threw in a picture of my cock?
Which brings me back to Brett Favre, and I think it is worth noting that in one of the alleged photos of Mr. Favre, he is pleasuring himself on a bed while wearing Crocs. And if you think about it, is there any better metaphor for the sad state of America today than an over the hill white guy lazily masturbating in plastic shoes?"
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Sunday, August 08, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
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